There You'll Be
by gregsanders1
Summary: Slash, Horatio/Speed. His lover is gone, but he will go on.
1. Chapter 1

TITLE: There you'll be

AUTHOR: Sam/Greg Sanders

GENRE: Slash

FANDOM: CSI Miami

PAIRING: Horatio/Speed

RATING: PG

WARNINGS: mention of character death

BETA'S: Becca/Paul & Kat/Ryan

DISCLAIMER: I don't own them…..just play with them

SUMMARY: Horatio thinks of a life without his love.

**"There you'll be"**

_When I think back  
On these times  
And the dreams  
We left behind  
I'll be glad 'cause  
I was blessed to get  
To have you in my life  
When I look back  
On these days  
I'll look and see your face  
You were right there for me_

Horatio sat in his backyard, nursing a beer and letting the memories of the past three years wash over him. He was not a selfish person normally, but right in this moment he wanted his lover back with him. He remembered all the times they had spent in the exact same spot he was now sitting in.__

In my dreams  
I'll always see you soar  
Above the sky  
In my heart  
There will always be a place  
For you for all my life  
I'll keep a part  
Of you with me  
And everywhere I am  
There you'll be  


After getting ready for bed, Horatio let the tears fall as he hugged Tim's pillow close, wishing that it was him instead. As he fell into an uneasy sleep, he thought he heard the voice of his lover saying "I'm right here"

_  
Well you showed me  
How it feels  
To feel the sky  
Within my reach  
And I always  
Will remember all  
The strength you  
Gave to me  
Your love made me  
Make it through  
Oh, I owe so much to you  
You were right there for me  
_

Horatio dreamed of blue skies that matched blue eyes, and a love that never died. He felt loved through the night and had his first full night's sleep in weeks. When he awoke the next morning he felt rejuvenated and ready to go on, knowing that he had his own personal guardian angel.

_  
'Cause I always saw in you  
My light, my strength  
And I want to thank you  
Now for all the ways  
You were right there for me  
You were right there for me  
For always_

As Horatio stood at the grave site, he pulled off his sunglasses to wipe away the tears. He knew that he could go on, and that the love he held for Tim in his heart would be his strength as he moved forward, alone. Kneeling down to change the flowers, he brushed his hand over the tombstone, and said the only thing that ever came to mind when he came here, "Thank you, and baby. I'll love you forever."

The End.


	2. Chapter 2 Behind Blue Eyes

TITLE: Behind Blue Eyes

WARNINGS: mention of character death

DISCLAIMER: I don't own them…..just play with them

SUMMARY: Horatio thinks of a life without his love.

"Behind Blue Eyes"

_No one knows what it's like  
To be the bad man  
To be the sad man  
Behind blue eyes  
And no one knows  
What it's like to be hated  
To be fated to telling only lies_

Horatio Caine was a man of few words, but when he chose to speak he really wished it was the truth that he could say. Don't get him wrong he never lied at work, but the rest of his life was. Everyone thought that it was his fashion sense that had him wearing his sunglasses all the time, but it wasn't. They hid the lies that he told with his eyes.

_But my dreams they aren't as empty  
As my conscience seems to be  
I have hours, only lonely  
My love is vengeance  
That's never free  
_

Sitting on the back deck of his beach house, Horatio sipped at his beer and tried to remember a time when he didn't feel like this. But the only time that he felt whole was when he was sleeping and under the spell of the dream master. That was when he could be free and loves the one that he was to be with, but couldn't be in life. He was never free.

_No one knows what it's like  
To feel these feelings  
Like I do, and I blame you!  
No one bites back as hard  
On their anger  
None of my pain and woe  
Can show through  
_  
Horatio stood at the scene and watched his team work, trying to remain calm when he was a torrid storm on the inside. He had learned at an early age not to show any emotion for it only brought on more pain.

_No one knows what it's like  
To be mistreated, to be defeated  
Behind blue eyes  
No one knows how to say  
That they're sorry and don't worry  
I'm not telling lies  
_  
Horatio stared down on the lifeless body of the blue eyed child as Alexx wrapped the small body for transport. How many times in his youth had it almost been him in this position? How many times had he wished that someone would say that they were sorry and that he didn't have to lie anymore?

_No one knows what it's like  
To be the bad man, to be the sad man  
Behind blue eyes._

Putting on his sunglasses, Horatio went back to being the bad man. The man that had to tell the parents that their son didn't make it because he wasn't fast enough.

The End.


End file.
